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#1 2018-03-04 00:48:40

ganesh
Administrator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 26,304

Animal Jokes

Q: What bird never needs a haircut?
A: A bald eagle.
* * *
Q: Where do black birds drink?
A: At a crowbar.
* * *
Q: What do you call the place where parrots make movies?
A: Pollywood.
* * *
Q: What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A: An udder failure.
* * *
Q: Which state has a lot of dogs and cats?
A: Petsylvania.
* * *
Q: Why did the dalmatian go to the cleaners?
A: His coat had spots all over it.
* * *
Q: Why did the dog become a motorcycle cop?
A: He wanted to chase speeding cars.
* * *
Q: Why did the dog have to move to a new apartment?
A: He lost his leash.
* * *
Q: Why did the little boy name his dog Computer?
A: Because it came with lots of bytes.
* * *
Q: Why did the man put his dog on a locomotive?
A: He wanted to train him.
* * *
Q: Why did the watchdog keep turning in circles?
A: He was winding himself up!
* * *
Q: What happens when a dog talks too much?
A: His tongue wags faster than his tail.
* * *
Q: What is a little dog's favorite drink?
A: Pupsi-cola.
* * *
Q: What kind of dog do farmers like best?
A: A Saint Barnyard.
* * *


It is no good to try to stop knowledge from going forward. Ignorance is never better than knowledge - Enrico Fermi. 

Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.

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#2 2018-03-13 03:09:10

ganesh
Administrator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 26,304

Re: Animal Jokes

Q: What do you call a painting of a cat?
A: A paw-trait.
* * *
Q: What part of a cat has more fur?
A: The outside.
* * *
Q: What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
A: That hit the spots!
* * *
Q: How do you make an Ape laugh?
A: Tell it a whale of a tale!
* * *
Q: What's black and dangerous and lives in a tree?
A: A ape with a machine gun.
* * *
Q: What do baby apes sleep in?
A: Ape-ricots!
* * *
Q: What's the first thing an ape learns in school?
A: The ape b c's!
* * *
Q: When do monkeys fall from the sky?
A: During ape-ril showers.
* * *
Q: Which sea will make you go ape?
A: The chimpan-sea!
* * *
Q: What's a monkey's favourite type of computer?
A: an Ape-le mac!
* * *
Q: What's a monkey's favourite fruit?
A: An ape-le!
* * *
Q: What sort of key does a ape need to open a banana?
A: A monk-key!
* * *
Q: At what time does a duck wake up?
A: At the quack of dawn.
* * *
Q: Where did the duck go when he was sick?
A: To the ducktor!
* * *
Q: What do ducks watch on TV?
A: Duck-umentaries!
* * *
Q: What do you call a camel without a hump?
A: Humphrey (Hump-free).
* * *
Q: What do camels use to hide themselves?
A: Camelflauge!
* * *
Q: What is a camels favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Humpty Dumpty.
* * *
Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: I have no I-Deer.
* * *
Q: Why didn't the leapord cross the road?
A: He didn't want to get spotted.
* * *
Q: What's a cheetah running a copy machine called?
A: A copycat!
* * *
Q: Did you hear about the fat cat that lost everything trying to count cards at the casino?
A: Cheetahs never prosper.
* * *
Q: Why isn't there gambling in Africa.
A: Because there are to many cheetahs.
* * *
Q: On which day do cheetah eat people ?
A: Chewsday!
* * *


It is no good to try to stop knowledge from going forward. Ignorance is never better than knowledge - Enrico Fermi. 

Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.

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