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#1 2008-03-12 13:58:38

Ricky
Moderator
Registered: 2005-12-04
Posts: 3,791

Limericks

1.

A woman in liquor production
Owns a still of exquisite construction.
The alcohol boils
Through magnetic coils.
She says that it's "proof by induction."

2.

There was an old man
From Peru, whose lim'ricks all
Look'd like haiku. He

Said with a laugh "I
Cut them in half, the pay is
Much better for two."

3. For those who have played Portal:

There once was a buggy AI
Who decided her subject should die.
When the plot was uncovered,
The subjected discovered
That sadly the cake was a lie.

4.

Rob, an odd fellow, designs
Poems of equal-length lines
And he limericks with flair
As his forethought and care
Ensure a word count of 3 9s

5. For those who know what a Rick Roll is:

There once was a man named Bertold
Who drank beer when the weather grew cold
As he reached for his cup...
"NEEEEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!!!"
Oh, snap! You just got limerickrolled!

6.

A programmer started to cuss
Because getting to sleep was a fuss
As he lay there in bed
Looping 'round in his head
was: while(!asleep()) sheep++;

7.

if(computer.fail==true){
background.setColor(blue);
user.frown();
sys.shutdown();
user.scream("OH, **** YOU");}


"In the real world, this would be a problem.  But in mathematics, we can just define a place where this problem doesn't exist.  So we'll go ahead and do that now..."

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#2 2008-10-12 16:39:24

All_Is_Number
Member
Registered: 2006-07-10
Posts: 258

Re: Limericks

Can you spot the limericks?





Last edited by All_Is_Number (2008-10-12 16:42:05)


You can shear a sheep many times but skin him only once.

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#3 2008-10-12 18:09:26

Tigeree
Member
Registered: 2005-11-19
Posts: 13,848

Re: Limericks

LOL! roflol Very clever u 2!  XD


People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.

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#4 2008-10-13 11:56:50

Chewy
Member
Registered: 2008-08-07
Posts: 67

Re: Limericks

Those are funny limericks ! Yes, clever !

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#5 2008-10-13 13:17:15

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,552

Re: Limericks

Most excellent!

Not math-related, but I love the Nantucket series:

    There once was a man from Nantucket
    Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
        But his daughter, named Nan,
        Ran away with a man
    And as for the bucket, Nantucket.


    But he followed the pair to Pawtucket,
    The man and the girl with the bucket;
        And he said to the man,
        He was welcome to Nan,
    But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.


    Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset,
    Where he still held the cash as an asset,
        But Nan and the man
        Stole the money and ran,
    And as for the bucket, Manhasset.


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#6 2008-10-13 21:08:54

Tigeree
Member
Registered: 2005-11-19
Posts: 13,848

Re: Limericks

yeah go Nantucket!
There is a major town in Ireland called Limericks, by the way. big_smile

Last edited by Tigeree (2008-10-13 21:09:21)


People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.

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#7 2009-05-17 06:47:48

LorraineBR
Member
Registered: 2009-05-13
Posts: 33

Re: Limericks

dey r relly funny. i specialy like de sheep 1 lol
nd its called Limrick nd its both a county and a city:)


Theres only 10 type of people in the world
Those that understand binary
And those that dont

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#8 2009-05-17 09:19:43

JaneFairfax
Member
Registered: 2007-02-23
Posts: 6,868

Re: Limericks

– There once was a prophet from Fife
Who predicted the end of his life.
When the moment drew near
He showed no sign of fear
As he stabbèd himself with a knife.

PS: Pronounce “stabbèd” as two syllables to maintain the metre. tongue

Last edited by JaneFairfax (2009-05-17 09:26:45)


Q: Who wrote the novels Mrs Dalloway and To the Lighthouse?

A: Click here for answer.

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#9 2009-05-29 13:56:52

jimmyR
Member
Registered: 2009-05-29
Posts: 143

Re: Limericks

Ricky wrote:

A woman in liquor production
Owns a still of exquisite construction.
The alcohol boils
Through magnetic coils.
She says that it's "proof by induction."

this is pretty good, especially the "proof by induction"
thanks,

jimmyR

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#10 2009-06-07 19:29:27

ganesh
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 15,130

Re: Limericks

Great ones, Ricky!


Character is who you are when no one is looking.

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#11 2009-06-17 00:54:25

soroban
Member
Registered: 2007-03-09
Posts: 452

Re: Limericks





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#12 2009-07-12 00:18:20

k1n0m1
Member
Registered: 2009-07-11
Posts: 5

Re: Limericks

Sorry if this one sounds a little offensive/violent.

Limericks are extremely amazing
They are, of course, highly entertaining
But if you don't like them
Then jump off the Big Ben
Because you seem very irritating.


~
Back with a vengeance.

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#13 2013-03-23 10:27:39

Nehushtan
Member
From: London
Registered: 2013-03-09
Posts: 615
Website

Re: Limericks

There once was a man named Jhough
Who lived in a place called Whough.
When folks scratching their head
Asked how they were said,
He said: “Simple! They both rhyme with Zhough.” tongue


By the way soroban’s ones are awesome. up

Last edited by Nehushtan (2013-03-23 10:28:18)


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