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Time is what keeps things from happening all at once.
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Patient: "Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake."
Doctor: "Next time, take off the candles."
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If you believe that the quickest way to a man's heart is the stomach, you know that you are aiming a little too high.
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I am so poor I can't even pay attention.
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I named my dog 6 miles so I can tell people that I walk 6 miles every single day.
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It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
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