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The human soul weighs 1.2lbs. I know because I've weighed myself before and after I walk into my job.
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I have won first place in this Halloween costume contest 16 years in a row. This year I am dressed as a hotdog. I'm on a roll.
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Where does a fish go to borrow money? The loan shark!
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Why didn't Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer's heart? Because even Cupid can't hit a target that small.
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What does "reading comprehension" even mean?
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It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
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