Math Is Fun Forum
You are not logged in.
- Topics: Active | Unanswered
#1 2005-09-02 16:04:06
- ahgua
- Member
- Registered: 2005-08-24
- Posts: 25
Clean Jokes
Why does a boy eat up his maths homework?
Answer will be shown tomorrow.
Try answering.
Last edited by ahgua (2005-09-02 16:04:34)
Life is a passing dream, but the death that follows is eternal...
Offline
#2 2005-09-03 16:32:44
- ahgua
- Member
- Registered: 2005-08-24
- Posts: 25
Re: Clean Jokes
Because his maths teacher says it was a piece of cake
Life is a passing dream, but the death that follows is eternal...
Offline
#3 2005-09-03 18:30:27
- Jai Ganesh
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-06-28
- Posts: 48,418
Re: Clean Jokes
Why was the Egyptian boy confused?
Because his dad became a mummy 
It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
Offline
#4 2005-10-02 06:54:46
- lesleyanne
- Member
- Registered: 2005-10-02
- Posts: 2
Re: Clean Jokes
because the teacher says its easy as pie!
Offline
#5 2005-10-02 07:24:01
- GreatClub
- Member
- Registered: 2005-09-19
- Posts: 18
Re: Clean Jokes
Thoese are pretty good jokes!
Offline
#6 2005-10-25 09:22:52
- m_f
- Member
- Registered: 2005-10-23
- Posts: 1
Re: Clean Jokes
Why does a boy eat up his maths homework?
Answer will be shown tomorrow.
Try answering.
Because he was afraid if 789 eat 6
Offline
#7 2005-10-25 16:12:34
- Jai Ganesh
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-06-28
- Posts: 48,418
Re: Clean Jokes
Hi m_f,
Welcome to the forum.
Nice pic.
It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
Offline
#8 2005-10-25 18:02:03
- MathsIsFun
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-01-21
- Posts: 7,713
Re: Clean Jokes
Yes, welcome.
But that "Because he was afraid if 789 eat 6" doesn't quite make sense, but nearly does ...
"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..." - Leon M. Lederman
Offline
#9 2005-10-25 19:22:40
- insomnia
- Real Member
- Registered: 2005-03-23
- Posts: 944
Re: Clean Jokes
Very nearly. Nice pic.
Friends are angels who lift our feet when our own wings have trouble remembering how to fly
Offline
#10 2005-10-26 21:41:31
- Jai Ganesh
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-06-28
- Posts: 48,418
Re: Clean Jokes
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they are okay, then...
It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
Offline
#11 2005-10-26 21:57:03
- mathsyperson
- Moderator
- Registered: 2005-06-22
- Posts: 4,900
Re: Clean Jokes
Apes and people both evolved from the same thing.
Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.
Offline
#12 2005-10-27 00:01:59
- MathsIsFun
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-01-21
- Posts: 7,713
Re: Clean Jokes
And you know that "pressing harder on the button" thing? It seems to work!
Another one:
If you eat meat it gets dissolved by stomach acid ... but our bodies are made of meat.
"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..." - Leon M. Lederman
Offline
#13 2005-10-27 00:07:00
- mathsyperson
- Moderator
- Registered: 2005-06-22
- Posts: 4,900
Re: Clean Jokes
But the stomach is surrounded by mucus that is hard to dissolve and if the acid manages to get past that then we have last resort alkali gland things to neutralise it.
Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.
Offline
#14 2005-10-27 00:33:00
- insomnia
- Real Member
- Registered: 2005-03-23
- Posts: 944
Re: Clean Jokes
And if we don't. Oh well. Free food falling out of body.
Friends are angels who lift our feet when our own wings have trouble remembering how to fly
Offline
#15 2005-10-27 00:51:00
- mathsyperson
- Moderator
- Registered: 2005-06-22
- Posts: 4,900
Re: Clean Jokes
What's the difference between a jeweller, a jailor and a jar of glue?
One sells watches, the other watches cells!
Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.
Offline
#16 2005-10-27 02:03:38
- carter1
- Member
- Registered: 2005-10-25
- Posts: 1
Re: Clean Jokes
If the boy ate is Math homework book,i think it because the thought the maths is going to flow in his vein,so that maths can be part of his sens of organs.
Offline
#17 2005-10-27 09:52:40
- MathsIsFun
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-01-21
- Posts: 7,713
Re: Clean Jokes
Quite possibly.
"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..." - Leon M. Lederman
Offline
#18 2005-10-27 17:32:41
- ryos
- Member
- Registered: 2005-08-04
- Posts: 394
Re: Clean Jokes
Because it might not be the batteries, but the buttons.
To motivate you not to overdraw.
Laziness. Paint is easier to check.
Vapor pressure and quick exhaustion of oxygen.
Habit.
Must be Mayan.
Reflexes. You can't see a bullet (well, maybe Superman could).
A linguist with a sense of irony.
They didn't.
The color isn't involved with bubbles.
I won't do it and you can't make me.
El que pega primero pega dos veces.
Offline
#19 2005-10-28 02:24:08
- insomnia
- Real Member
- Registered: 2005-03-23
- Posts: 944
Re: Clean Jokes
All my friends are mad. But apparently I'm the maddest as I couldn't stop laughin for 2-3 Hours.
Friends are angels who lift our feet when our own wings have trouble remembering how to fly
Offline
#20 2005-11-18 21:16:17
- Jai Ganesh
- Administrator
- Registered: 2005-06-28
- Posts: 48,418
Re: Clean Jokes
(1)While working as a television news cameraman, I arrived at an accident scene, and a cameraman from another station pulled up behind me. As I parked the news cruiser, I heard a policeman on the scanner using the radio phonetic alphabet to alert other officers. "Be aware that the Mike Echo Delta India Alpha has arrived," he said.
I approached the officer, looked him in the eye and said, "You might be surprised to know that some of us in the Mike Echo Delta India Alpha can Sierra Papa Echo Lima Lima."
(2)A famous football coach was on vacation with his family in Maine. When they walked into a movie theater and sat down, the handful of people there applauded. He thought to himself, "I can't believe it. People recognize me all the way up here."
Then a man came over to him and said, "Thanks for coming. They won't start the movie unless we have ten paying people or more."
(3)A little boy watched, fascinated, as his mother gently rubbed cold cream on her face.
"Why are you rubbing cold cream on you face, mommy?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said his mother.
A few minutes later, she began removing the cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" he asked. "Are you giving up?"
(4)While a friend and I were visiting Annapolis, we noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand.
"What are they doing?" I asked our tour guide.
"Each year," he replied with a grin, "The upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard."
When we were out of earshot of the freshmen, my friend asked our guide: "So what's the answer?"
The guide replied: "One."
(5) Imagine you are in a sinking rowboat surrounded by great white sharks. How would you survive?
(Scroll down for the answer)
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Stop imagining!
(You may groan now)
It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
Offline
#21 2005-11-19 08:26:18
- jU
- Real Member
- Registered: 2005-08-17
- Posts: 1,923
Re: Clean Jokes
ha ha ha ha ha ha
groan groan groan groan groan
Offline
#22 2005-11-21 04:03:19
- meldon15
- Member
- Registered: 2005-11-21
- Posts: 3
Re: Clean Jokes
wow that joke is lame
Offline
#23 2005-11-21 08:25:48
- mathsyperson
- Moderator
- Registered: 2005-06-22
- Posts: 4,900
Re: Clean Jokes
Lame jokes are the best kind. They keep hijacking my signature.
Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.
Offline
#24 2005-11-24 18:55:40
- justlookingforthemoment
- Moderator
- Registered: 2005-05-26
- Posts: 2,161
Re: Clean Jokes
What did Sushi A say to Sushi B?
Wassup B!
Offline
#25 2005-11-24 19:54:53
- jU
- Real Member
- Registered: 2005-08-17
- Posts: 1,923
Re: Clean Jokes
I know this one has gone round
why was 6 afraid of 7 because 789
Offline