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Q: What has a face and two hands but no arms, legs, or a body?
A: A clock.
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Q: What do cars eat on their toast?
A: Petroleum jelly.
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I have a phobia of over engineered buildings. I have a complex complex complex.
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Lady: "Is this my train?"
Station Master: "No, it belongs to the railway company."
Lady: "Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New York."
Station Master: "No Madam, I’m afraid it’s too heavy."
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Q: What is a question with a different answer every time you're asked?
A: "What time is it?"
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It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
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