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Q: How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three--one to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.
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Q: Why does California have the most attorneys, and New Jersey have the most toxic waste dumps?
A: New Jersey got first pick.
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Q: What's the difference between an attorney and a pit bull?
A: Jewelry.
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Q: What do lawyers use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.
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Q: What's the definition of mixed emotions?
A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff in your new Ferrari.
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It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
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